I have been 23 years. I wish I had had the FWO book. I know you said that you have read it, so I honestly would take that to heart. I wish I could go back and communicate better with my husband. I think that it would have saved a lot of grief and heartache if I had just been more honest and open with him. A lot of women don't want to speak the truth in love because they don't want to make their man feel bad. Sometimes you just need to be truthful, open, and honest. We too often expect them to guess, understand our hints, or whatever. Men don't do well at taking hints. You have to just say what needs to be said. If he asks you what you want to do, eat, where to go, then just say it. If he asks what is wrong then tell him. Don't say I'm fine when you aren't. I am not totally sure I am answering your request here, but I hope I am helping. My husband and I are much better now than we were, but I would have to say that I was the one at fault for not communicating clearly. That is my regret.
I think you seem to want to go into this relationship with the right heart and the right attitude. I wouldn't spend a lot of time obsessing about everything. Start being honest at the beginning. Maybe you could make the respect issue something you two discuss together. Then he could tell you what respect is for him. I hope this encourages you. It seems like you are already off to a great start. |